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Shattered Dreams at Google: Trash Onboarding, Clueless Devs, and Corporate Red Tape

May 22, 20263 min read

Grinded LeetCode for 10 years to join Google, only to find awful onboarding, incompetent coworkers, and toxic bureaucracy. Here is the reality check.

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Nguồn gốc: https://coding4food.com/post/shattered-dreams-google-onboarding-clueless-devs-bureaucracy. Nội dung thuộc bản quyền Coding4Food. Original source: https://coding4food.com/post/shattered-dreams-google-onboarding-clueless-devs-bureaucracy. Content is property of Coding4Food. This content was scraped without permission from https://coding4food.com/post/shattered-dreams-google-onboarding-clueless-devs-bureaucracyNguồn gốc: https://coding4food.com/post/shattered-dreams-google-onboarding-clueless-devs-bureaucracy. Nội dung thuộc bản quyền Coding4Food. Original source: https://coding4food.com/post/shattered-dreams-google-onboarding-clueless-devs-bureaucracy. Content is property of Coding4Food. This content was scraped without permission from https://coding4food.com/post/shattered-dreams-google-onboarding-clueless-devs-bureaucracy
Nguồn gốc: https://coding4food.com/post/shattered-dreams-google-onboarding-clueless-devs-bureaucracy. Nội dung thuộc bản quyền Coding4Food. Original source: https://coding4food.com/post/shattered-dreams-google-onboarding-clueless-devs-bureaucracy. Content is property of Coding4Food. This content was scraped without permission from https://coding4food.com/post/shattered-dreams-google-onboarding-clueless-devs-bureaucracyNguồn gốc: https://coding4food.com/post/shattered-dreams-google-onboarding-clueless-devs-bureaucracy. Nội dung thuộc bản quyền Coding4Food. Original source: https://coding4food.com/post/shattered-dreams-google-onboarding-clueless-devs-bureaucracy. Content is property of Coding4Food. This content was scraped without permission from https://coding4food.com/post/shattered-dreams-google-onboarding-clueless-devs-bureaucracy
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How many of you code monkeys here are grinding LeetCode until your fingers bleed, dreaming of the Google "holy land"? Free food, fancy coffee, surrounded by 10x wizards? Wake up, my dudes. A mid-career TPM (Technical Program Manager) just joined Google and went straight to Reddit to cry about his shattered dreams. Let's dive into this reality check with Coding4Food and see how dark the Big Tech "pink goggles" really are.

The "Dream Job" Dumpster Fire: A Quick Recap

OP has 10 years of experience, worked at 3 tech companies (one being Big Tech), and always saw Google as the ultimate endgame. He expected brilliant minds and a flawless internal machine. He just passed probation, and here is the tea he spilled:

  • Onboarding is a joke: Two whole weeks of twiddling thumbs, reading outdated docs with dead links. His manager's favorite phrase was "don't worry about that for now." Two months later, he finally got invited to the "Welcome to Google" orientation to receive... a notebook and a pen. Wild.
  • Coworkers aren't demigods: OP was shell-shocked to find an L4 dev who needs his hand held like a toddler. Asked to fix broken links in a doc, the guy fixes exactly one and leaves the other 5 broken. Another dude has a terrible attitude and zero delivery, but management just shrugs it off.
  • Arrogance max pro: Tenured folks flexing about how great the company and perks are, yet failing at basic deductive reasoning. They've been inside the Google bubble for so long they are clueless about the real tech world outside their fancy walls.
  • Bureaucracy at its finest: Spot a glaring process gap? Don't touch it. "It's known and owned by someone." Yeah, and that someone has been ignoring it for months or even years. Nobody wants to collaborate to actually fix the damn thing.
  • Frankenstein slides: Attended a VP meeting where every presenter used a different slide theme. No corporate branding, no standards. A trillion-dollar company presenting like college freshmen pulling a 3 AM deadline panic.

OP's conclusion: "This is where my ambition has come to die. The food is great, but that's not why I'm here."

The Reddit Hivemind: Copium or Reality?

The post racked up over a thousand upvotes. The community quickly split into a few main camps:

  • The Team Lottery (Gacha gaming IRL): Most devs agree that joining Google is like rolling a gacha. Pull an SSR core team, you innovate. Pull a bad one, you're stuck in a retirement home for coasting engineers. Bouncing around teams until you find a good fit is the norm.
  • The LeetCode Monkey Invasion: One veteran pointed out that Google 2024 is NOT Google 2014. The real OG wizards left a long time ago. Now the company is filled with "fortune-seekers" who ace algorithms but can't engineer their way out of a paper bag in the real world.
  • Corporate BS is Universal: Welcome to Corporate America. Big company equals big bureaucracy. FAANG isn't immune to the classic large-corp pitfalls.

The Coding4Food Verdict: Stop Worshipping Tech Corporations

TL;DR: A job is a job. For those of you who recently failed the Google interview loop, use this post as top-tier copium.

The lesson here? Never put a company on a pedestal. Everywhere has geniuses and dead weights. If your current team is full of average Joes, congratulations, you're carrying them. If you want real thrills, maybe stop waiting for a Big Tech offer. Grab a vps to host your own startup, or use some ai tools to automate your boring tasks while you cash your paycheck. Go to work to make money, not to find your life's purpose.

Source: Reddit - I joined Google and I’m really disappointed